篇一：申请美国大学入学文书范本
申请美国大学入学文书范本
I guess it was inevitable that I’d be on hockey skates at some point in my life, but I did not expect that I’d become one of a rare group of female ice hockey officials before I even reached high school. Being born into a family of hockey players and figure skaters, it seemed that my destiny had already been decided.
Right from the beginning, my two older brothers and my father strapped me up and threw me onto the ice. I loved it and, in my mind, I was on my way to becoming a female Gretzky! But my mom had to think of something fast to drag her little girl away from this sport of ruffians. Enter my first hot pink figure skating dress! That was all it took to launch fifteen years of competitive figure skating. Even though figure skating soon became my passion, I always had an unsatisfied yearning for ice hockey. It took a great deal of convincing from my parents that competitive figure skating and ice hockey didn’t mix. My compromise became refereeing ice hockey; little did I know that I was beginning an activity that would influence my character and who I am today. When I began, I would only work with my dad and brothers. Everyone was friendly and accepting because I had just started. I soon realized though that to get better I needed to start refereeing with people I wasn’t related to, and that’s when my experience drastically changed. An apologetic smile and an “I’m sorry” wasn’t going to
get me through games now. As I began officiating higher-level games and dealing with more arrogant coaches, I suddenly entered a new male-dominated world, a world I had never experienced before. My confidence was shot, and all I wanted to do was get through each game and be able to leave. Sometimes I was even too scared to skate along the teams’ benches because I would get upset by what the coaches would yell to me. “Do you have a hot date tonight, ref?” was a typical comment that coaches would spit at me during the course of a game. In their eyes, I did not belong on that ice, and they were going to do whatever they could do to make sure no women wanted to officiate their games. I was determined not to let them chase me off the ice.
I made the decision to stand up for myself. I never responded rudely to the coaches, but I did not let them walk all over me and destroy my confidence anymore. I started to act and feel more like the 4-year certified Atlantic District Official that I am. There were still a few situations that scared me. One time I called a penalty in a championship game during the third overtime and the team I penalized ended up losing because they got scored on. I knew I had made the right call, even though I was unnerved when I saw the losing teams’ parents waiting for me at my locker room; for the moment I wished I hadn’t called that penalty. Although it was scary at the time, I stood my ground and overcame my fears. That was an important
stepping-stone in my officiating career and in my life.
After four years of refereeing, I still can’t say it’s easy. Every game hands me something new and I never know what to expect. Now I have the confidence and preparation to deal with the unexpected, on and off the ice. I now also know to take everything with a grain of salt and not let it get to me. I have learned that life is just like being out on the ice; if I am prepared and act with confidence, I will be perceived as confident. These are the little lessons that I’m grateful to have learned as a woman referee.
Things to Notice About This Essay
1. The author tells an interesting story about her experiences as a referee.
2. A sense of her personality—determination, flexibility, good humor—comes through in the narration.
3. Details like “Do you have a hot date tonight, ref?” make the narration memorable (we’d love to hear more of these kinds of details).
4. The essay needs a faster start. The first paragraph (three sentences) says the same thing in both the first and third sentences—and gives away the essay’s surprise in the second! A good revision would delete all of paragraph one and start at paragraph two.
5. There’s too much frame here and not enough picture. The essay needs further development, especially about the difficulties of
becoming and being a ref, to keep it vivid.
6. The author should “dwell” in the meaning of the experience a little more at the end—“I wonder about…I also think…Sometimes I believe….” Significant experiences like this one, woven through many years of the author’s life, don’t mean just one thing—there are more insights and lessons to explore here.
篇二：美国大学文书申请范文
美国大学文书申请范文
I guess it was inevitable that I’d be on hockey skates at some point in my life, but I did not expect that I’d become one of a rare group of female ice hockey officials before I even reached high school. Being born into a family of hockey players and figure skaters, it seemed that my destiny had already been decided.
Right from the beginning, my two older brothers and my father strapped me up and threw me onto the ice. I loved it and, in my mind, I was on my way to becoming a female Gretzky! But my mom had to think of something fast to drag her little girl away from this sport of ruffians. Enter my first hot pink figure skating dress! That was all it took to launch fifteen years of competitive figure skating. Even though figure skating soon became my passion, I always had an unsatisfied yearning for ice hockey. It took a great deal of convincing from my parents that competitive figure skating and ice hockey didn’t mix.
My compromise became refereeing ice hockey; little did I know that I was beginning an activity that would influence my character and who I am today. When I began, I would only work with my dad and brothers. Everyone was friendly and accepting because I had just started. I soon realized though that to get better I needed to start refereeing with
people I wasn’t related to, and that’s when my experience drastically changed. An apologetic smile and an “I’m sorry” wasn’t going to get me through games now. As I began officiating higher-level games and dealing with more arrogant coaches, I suddenly entered a new male-dominated world, a world I had never experienced before. My confidence was shot, and all I wanted to do was get through each game and be able to leave. Sometimes I was even too scared to skate along the teams’ benches because I would get upset by what the coaches would yell to me. “Do you have a hot date tonight, ref?” was a typical comment that coaches would spit at me during the course of a game. In their eyes, I did not belong on that ice, and they were going to do whatever they could do to make sure no women wanted to officiate their games. I was determined not to let them chase me off the ice.
I made the decision to stand up for myself. I never responded rudely to the coaches, but I did not let them walk all over me and destroy my confidence anymore. I started to act and feel more like the 4-year certified Atlantic District Official that I am. There were still a few situations that scared me. One time I called a penalty in a championship game during the third overtime and the team I penalized ended up losing because they got scored on. I knew I had made the right call, even though I was unnerved when I saw the losing
teams’ parents waiting for me at my locker room; for the moment I wished I hadn’t called that penalty. Although it was scary at the time, I stood my ground and overcame my fears. That was an important stepping-stone in my officiating career and in my life.
After four years of refereeing, I still can’t say it’s easy. Every game hands me something new and I never know what to expect. Now I have the confidence and preparation to deal with the unexpected, on and off the ice. I now also know to take everything with a grain of salt and not let it get to me. I have learned that life is just like being out on the ice; if I am prepared and act with confidence, I will be perceived as confident. These are the little lessons that I’m grateful to have learned as a woman referee.
Things to Notice About This Essay
1. The author tells an interesting story about her experiences as a referee.
2. A sense of her personality—determination, flexibility, good humor—comes through in the narration.
3. Details like “Do you have a hot date tonight, ref?” make the narration memorable (we’d love to hear more of these kinds of details).
4. The essay needs a faster start. The first paragraph (three sentences) says the same thing in both the first and third sentences—and gives away the essay’s surprise in the second! A good revision would delete all of paragraph one and start at paragraph two.
5. There’s too much frame here and not enough picture. The essay needs further development, especially about the difficulties of becoming and being a ref, to keep it vivid.
6. The author should “dwell” in the meaning of the experience a little more at the end—“I wonder about…I also think…Sometimes I believe….” Significant experiences like this one, woven through many years of the author’s life, don’t mean just one thing—there are more insights and lessons to explore here.
篇三：美国大学申请文书怎么写能出奇制胜
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美国大学申请文书怎么写能出奇制胜 美国大学申请文书的重要性在美国留学申请中的地位大家都是了解的，所以想要成功申请美国留学，美国本科申请文书的写作还是很重要的，那美国留学文书怎么写呢，大家想要了解的话就请随小编一起来看下文吧。
一份成功的美国本科留学文书是破除中国式思维定势的，美国留学文书怎么写，通常来说，中国化的思考方式很多是喜欢在获取的成就上作盲目攀比，如奥数金牌和奥物银牌哪个厉害，学生会长和部长哪个职位更高等。其实，诸如此类的两者间是没有可比性的，关键在于阐述你和别人最不一样的地方在哪里。
美国大学申请文书写作都习惯将学生获得的奖项作为成就来呈现。随着申请美国名校的人越来越多，奖项的地位变得复杂莫测，得到荣誉、金牌等未必就能给进名校增加砝码，关键还在于呈现荣誉时如何做到出奇制胜。美国留学文书怎么写，申请者普遍认为，美国本科申请文书写作要打动人，打动审核委员才能成功进入名校。美国大学申请文书写作而在美国留学众多案例中，没有一位学生是因为文章的辞藻华丽或情节感人才被录取，撰写自身经历最重要的是充分挖掘其中的意涵。
比如斯坦福大学喜欢“领导力”，那么学生在美国大学申请文书写作时应该不仅仅抛出一个学生会或社会团体干部的领导经验或最终得奖结果，美国留学文书怎么写，重点在于如何表达出自己具备领导者“改变(Change)”的观念与能力。要详尽阐释自身重要经历的过程以及经历这个事件的前后，突出在自己的带领下团体所做的改变，遇到了怎样的困难，又是怎样勇往直前的，自己获得了怎样的体悟和升华，藉此体现自己的领袖气质。另外，美国名校非常注重个体改变现状的思维和能力，美国大学名校申请者都很优秀，竞争激烈，所以校方会以申请者的过去预测未来，挑选优秀人才。美国名校平台建议，美国本科申请文书写作要符合美国人的思路和口味，贵在意涵与动情之间的平衡。
美国大学申请文书写作怎样才能够出奇制胜，相信大家通过上文对于美国留学文书怎么写能够有所了解，最后小编祝愿大家都能够写出成功美国本科申请文书。
天道教育留学方案结合天道六步曲服务体系，首创留学精英课程，科学理性规划，提升背景，强调团队沟通和个性辅导，重在全面提升申请人综合竞争力。我们拥有上千成功案例，庞大的海外名校数据库资源，华人领域最专业顾问团队和海内外广大的天道校友网络的支持。天道留学方案形式讲究重在参与，采用互动分享的Workshop，多对一的个性化辅导。我们确保拿到满意申请结果的同时，加强申请者团队意识，自我认知和沟通能力，系统掌握求职、面试以及海外生存技巧，积累受益终生的人脉资源。详情了解天道留学方案请点击：http://tiandaoedu.com/lxcp/lxfa/
原文地址：http://undergrad.tiandaoedu.com/instruments/174934.html
资料参考：美国大学申请http://undergrad.tiandaoedu.com/choice/
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